My Bloody Valentine
Hmmm. It’s Valentine’s Day and I can’t remember if this is ninth or tenth I’ve been alone for. I guess it doesn’t matter after a while. Since I’m fond of lists, I’ll go ahead and make one. I’m sure it’ll be incomplete, but here it goes.
From the home office in … uhm … actually from my parent house in New York here are “The Top 10 Most Ridiculous Moments in my Romantic Life.”
10) Learning that Marissa was going to the prom with someone else. (I was her boyfriend so I assumed she’d be going with me.)
9) Discovering that Hyacinth and Wil were together.
8) That time I was dumped for not changing religions. (Shane I put this one in just for you.)
7) The time I visited Diane and learned she got married the week before.
6) Insert your favorite Sandra moment here.
5) Discovering that Sharon and Vince were together. This one was great because she was asleep in my (hotel) bed and he pulls me aside for a chat in the bathroom.
4) The night I ruined my friendship with Sue by calling her Sharon at a really inopportune time.
3) Giving The Girl that book I wrote for her. (I still have half a mind to break into her place and steal it so I can deny ever writing it.)
2) Reaching down to hold her hand after an amazing night, after making what I thought was an incredible connection, and after hearing how special I was more than I’ve ever heard in my life only to feel … (wait for it) … a wedding ring.
And the number one most ridiculous moments in my romantic life…
1) Going on a perfect date with a girl I didn’t deserve to be spending time with.
In the immortal words of Mick Foley, “Have a nice day!”