While I was in Thailand, I lost my job over a fairly dumb matter (almost all my friends in the business said that it wasn’t something I should have lost a job over). I also lost some friends over the whole thing. I still don’t know what happened, but I was told by people in the office that I was made the scapegoat and someone that I thought was my friend totally trashed me. That part sucks on multiple levels; I wasn’t around to defend myself and I was supposedly sold out by someone that I’ve known for more than ten years. I guess people believed his side of the story, because that whole circle just shut me out. Again, I don’t know exactly what happened because I wasn’t in the country and I doubt I’ll ever get the real story.

Things just kept getting worse. My knee was really bad (it still needs surgery) — just difficult and painful to do simple things, like take a shower. One of the great friends in my life passed away. I struggled (and am still struggling) financially. There were even a few days where I had to wait a day or two until I could eat.

It has been a really challenging year for me. A lot of people point to times like this as character building. That definitely wasn’t the case for me — it was more soul crushing than anything else. The trials and tribulations of the last year have made me worse. I worry so much about money, paying the bills, and making rent that it’s hard to be creative. I used to be really bold with how I approach work and I used to love taking risks. I’m too scared and skittish to be that way. It’s like this black cloud is always hanging over me.

Earlier in the year I went out with Aletheia and she reminded me of how I used to be. It’s the reason she was drawn to me and why we connected. I’m not that guy anymore. I don’t like what I’ve become. My primary concerns used to be doing something creative and fun — trying to make something great. I used to dream about producing cool videos, making fun web sites, etc. Now I just dream about money. I hate that I’m like this now.

Yeah, I suppose this has been a downer birthday post, but that wasn’t my intention. I’m aware of these problems and I’m trying to change. Can I get back to the way I used to be? I don’t know…but I can definitely be better than how I am now. I will try.

Anyway, here are some pictures of how the apartment has progressed in a few days.

In a lot of ways, this is better. I have less time to brood about stupid work things (accounts payable, health insurance) and I have no time to get sad. Today was a bit of a mad dash — turning on utilities, getting a cashier’s check, changing address, buying plane tickets, etc. It’s good that I was so busy. Otherwise I’d start thinking about all the people, places, and things I’ll miss about San Francisco.

I really suck at saying goodbye. There are lots of people I wanted to see before I left, but it would have made leaving a more…difficult experience. Certainly I would have loved to have seen Rannie. I wish she was there for my farewell dinner with Kit and Kenny. I’ll miss both of those  guys a ton. I’ve been living with Kit for over five years. There’s a lot I’ve learned from him, some of which I’ve integrated (or tried) into my personality. I admire the way he shows his emotions — he’s rarely difficult to read. Too often in the past I’ve tried to hide things or make people think I was feeling another way, simply to satisfy them. With Kit, I’ve learned that it’s perfectly fine to feel the way you feel without feeling exposed or embarrassed or overly concerned with how others will react. Kenny and I have had some great adventures in Thailand and America. He’s truly one of the sweetest and most generous people I’ve ever met. He’s been incredible to Noot and made her transition to Western life exponentially easier.

It’s going to be tough for Noot in Los Angeles. Without people like Kit andKenny around, I worry about her being lonely or having difficulty with simple things. I won’t be working from home anymore and I’ll have a short commute every day. The first month (maybe two?) I’ll be worrying way too much about her. I know she’ll adapt quickly, but I worry about her making friends. She has some really good friends in San Francisco and it’s a shame that she’s leaving them behind for a city where she doesn’t really know anyone, aside from a few of my friends that she’s met once or twice. I hope she makes her own friends quickly. I really worry about being away on business; in SF, Kit and Kenny were around if anything happened. I worry about Noot being alone in LA.

Los Angeles should be good in most ways. Even though I’m getting screwed with health insurance (admittedly through a stupid mistake of my own), it’s good to have steady work, benefits, and all that. The warmer weather will be great too and it’ll be fun learning a new city with Noot.

[Break: Just spent a few hours drinking a bottle of champagne with Kit.]

Okay, the champagne and enjoyable conversation made me forget about the rest of my thoughts. Also, I need to do a bit of work before heading to the airport. Bye bye!

1) Can’t get a hold of the movers. They’re supposed to come tomorrow. When? I have no idea. I really hope things didn’t get messed up with that.

2) My deposit check us MIA. I sent it via UPS on Wednesday. It was supposed to arrive on Friday. UPS is trying to locate it.

3) My health insurance situation is way expensive. Apparently the rates went up after I received my initial literature and I didn’t notice this when I was signing up online. Now I’m stuck paying over $250 a week for health insurance. Yes, it’s better to have it than not, but had I know the rates would be so ridiculously high, I would have opted for a private plan. F you Spherion and Aetna.

- I got to interview \”Rowdy\” Roddy Piper, Sergeant Slaughter, JTG, Tommy Dreamer, Kofi Kingston, Shelton Benjamin, and Eve during the Superstar Challenge. Meeting legends like Piper and Slaughter was just completely frickin\’ awesome, but the highlight of the night was catching up with Shelton. I was shocked that he remembered me from previous interviews. The footage probably wasn\’t the best from the night, but it ended up being a fun spot that looked like two buddies catching up.

- Prior to the hall of fame ceremony, I interviewed Ted DiBiase, Mickie James, Beth Phoenix, and Mr. Kennedy (Kennedy). My interview with Ken was a little weak and I was disappointed I couldn\’t do more with the time. The boys said he was drunk, so maybe that explains it. DiBiase is a legend, but he was sweating during the interview and I kept worrying about the shot. My spot with Mickie was totally fun. She gave me a big hug towards the end of the interview and it totally caught me off guard. Clearly she has a crush on me.

- The hall of fame ceremony itself was pretty cool. I was huge on Steamboat and Kerry Von Erich. I loathed Terry Funk as a kid (a testament to how great a heel he was) but came to love his work in ECW. Austin was phenomenal and a huge part of why WWE overtook WCW. That said, it wasn\’t as enjoyable as last year\’s ceremony. The emotion behind Flair\’s induction was tremendous and The Rock did a masterful job at warming up the crowd. This year, it felt overproduced and too constrained by TV time. I wish Austin had more time to talk about his career, particularly the early days, training with Chris Adams, winning minor titles in WCW, and finding his voice in ECW. It\’s just a shame that a portion of the event is live. I\’d love to hear these great stories from these legendary wrestlers.

- It was great fun working with Joel again. I miss hanging and working with him from my Yahoo! Reset days. It was cool to be working with a shooter that I have a vibe with. My best stuff has always been with shooters that I know and like. I don\’t have to worry about the shot or anything. I just try to entertain myself and the shooter — the results are usually pretty good. Plus, I know Joel is an awesome editor and will come up with great stuff. It was cool taking him to his first WrestleMania event. Hopefully our project turns some heads at work.

- Naturally, hanging out with the boys made the trip an absolute blase. I didn\’t get to hang with Justin much, since he kept riding in the jobber bus while I was with the other headliners. Wasting time with Jose, Geoff, and Joey was a total trip. It was cool seeing Willy and Scully — guys I only see at WrestleMania. Jaime was an excellent babysitter and put up with our excessive impersonations of \”Stone Cold\”, Chris Jericho, Geoff Keighley, and more. It was the most fun I\’ve had on the road in a long, long time, but at the end of the day I still missed being home with Noot. Funny how that goes.

- The costumes were totally cool. I really loved the modernized Nite Owl costume. A lot of people complained about Veidt’s outfit, but I liked it. Laurie’s was sexy too. It doesn’t count as a costume, but I guess it’s a nice thing that Manhattan’s dong got bigger. I’m sure he feels better about it.

- Christian pointed out that the movie did a poor job at conveying how huge Veidt’s company was. It had its hands in everything…almost like a Daewoo. I remember going to a late ’90s CES and being shocked at the variety of Daewoo products at its booth: cars, electronics, guns, sporting goods, etc. Veidt Industries was just like that.

Now for some spoilerificness!

Some of the scenes were changed from subtle to in-your-face. Did people really need Dr. Manhattan to tell them that Blake was Laurie’s father? In Rorschach’s big transformation scene, did it need to be said that the murderer killed the little girl? I’m not sure what’s sadder — the fact that Snyder felt that people needed to be told outright or that some people need to be told out right. Ugh.

“So impotent.” and “I did it!” Five words that were not in the movie, taken from two powerful panels in the book.

Ozymandias was all wrong. I always felt that the actor was too young, but he also had this crap accent. If that’s the way Snyder wanted to go then he should have went full on and gotten Christopher Lambert (not really). I also agree with my friend Dan in thinking that Ozy’s portrayal was way off. You never got the sense that he cared about the world so much that he was willing to kill millions in order to save. Christian pointed out that he came off as petty, which is absolutely true.

Dr. Manhattan worked way better than I thought he would. He’s a very difficult character to make interesting in a movie. Snyder totally pulled this off.

Rorschach was awesome, but some of my favorite scenes and subtleties were absent. Kelly Leak really was the best choice for this role. It’s one of those performances where I can’t think of anyone that could’ve done a better job. Very cool. Younger moviegoers will love him. Hopefully they read the book for his full awesomeness.

Patrick Wilson did a fine job at portraying Nite Owl as a broken and lost man. Aside from the lack of weight, he was a perfect Dan. The costume really transformed him and made him heroic.

Laurie wasn’t as bad as I’ve read. Out of all the main characters, she had the most material cut and it showed. Still, she didn’t bother me. She was just kind of there.

The Comedian was pretty perfect, even more than Rorschach. I guess those two performances were the truest.

I was surprised at how entertaining the action was. I wasn’t expecting much, but the fight scenes were brutal and fun.

In the end, I’m happy that I saw the movie and I’m happy that it exists. I’m curious to see the blu-ray release with the added scenes and the Black Freighter stuff. I still don’t know who this movie is for though. It’ll confuse the crap out of newcomers, while those familiar with the source material have plenty to complain about.

Anyway, here’s a rundown of my videos:

Good Stuff

Chris Taylor

Todd Hollenshead

Pete Wanat

Okay Stuff

Used Games Package

Bruce Shelley

Joseph Olin

Greg Zeschuk and Ray Muzyka

David Perry

Economic Challenges Package

Developers Most Wanted in 2009 Package

Stuff I Bombed

Todd Howard

Brian Raffel